Mr Bin Laden sir…..the infidels think it’s us? they are all laughing at us

al-qaida’s top brass have distanced themselves from the recent terrorist activity in london and glasgow. lieutenants of the organisation were over heard laughing and joking about the amateurish tactics. jokes about irish terrorists being back on the uk mainland started doing the rounds. the mood changed when a general in the organisation said people would blame al-qaida for these attacks, and that people would be joking and laughing at al-qaida!

lieutenants and generals rushed out a statement to distances themselves from the failed attacks. “you know when it’s us because we blow ourselves up” they stated.

Happy birthday, walrus! Aww, you shouldn’t have

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BBC use a existing employee in second series of new show!

second series of a bbc daytime show (bbc are hoping it will become a format) are currently finding contestants to be on the new series. one of the families have been chosen, and the mum of the family is a current bbc employee. producers (the ginger one) are keen for her to finish her job before the show transmits, i.e. if she is moving, she would not have a job at the bbc. so quit now and the public/press will never know. maybe the woman’s neighbours know? have you guessed what it is yet?

i’m sure editorial policy must have something to say about this?

My thursday nights have now been sorted.

currently watching question time live on the internet. great quality streaming and great programme. i’m able to watch in on my powerbook in a stand alone real player window, would prefer quicktime….work it out bbc. wtf? the bbc never cater any of its products towards macs?

tonight it has piers morgan (prick) on though. menzies campbell is on too. i feel sorry for that old fuck. i really like him, but he always seems to be making two steps forward and one back.

oops david dimbleby just turned down a question to the new housing minster (don’t know her name, but she she looks like ron ruth kelly) from a black guy! he could of handled it better, came across as a right racist bastard. lets start a rumour….david dimbleby is a racist!

oh cool!….this week is streamed live after question time. oh fuck! just when i find a way of spending a productive thursday night, i’ve just remembered mp’s break for the summer soon.

god there are some boring bastards in the audience this week. one guy was just talking about economics being to blame for all the floods up north. he was properly right, but said it like stephen hawking’s! stuttering and shit!

update: cool black dude finally got airtime! fight the power!

BBC launch iPlayer, but then say we don’t live in a ideal world

BBC web downloads set to launch

This is a good start, but no mac option, no mobile content, no freeview, hell not even vista, only XP and IE users and all programme’s full of DRM….thats bad news there. I’m a realist, so no shock there is no Mac support, but no vista? (although vista is awful) that’s a surprise.

I went to a chat on this a year ago. It looked good (it did). But that’s the problem, the chat and showcase was a year ago. The iPlayer should have been launched then. C4, Sky, Virgin and others have brought there own products out since then. The BBC have still not said if they will post there vast archive onto this. That would make it shit hot! No doubt ‘rights holders’ (people with enough money already) are having a big say in those discussions.

Think I’ll stick to downloading torrents

Check Google News for (good or bad) comments on the iPlayer.

Guy at work behaves like a complete prick on the phone

I work in television. Work for a big television media company that has departments and stuff. I’m currently working for long running shite programme. Part of my job on the programme is to find future contestants. This is pure hell! I have to listen to either some stupid young prick story about the time at university he and some mates when ‘tangoing’ people. Or some middle aged cats protection worker chatting about stupid fucking sock puppets……fuck off, i don’t give a shit! i’d rather be on facebook.

We have a new guy (let’s call him Cecil) at work who seems eager to impress. I’m sure he would touch his toes for the boss…and she is a woman! In the last week he has been ringing prospective contestants vermin. Unlike me, he is professional and goes along with all the niceties. Says hello, laughs on cue, etc etc. Chats like this ‘you sound really nice you, i’d love to meet you even if you don’t appear on the programme’….wtf! she was over 50 mate! if he wanted to fuck her (lets say he did) he would of had to stick her in a warm bath and rolled her in flour! dirty fuck!

Today though he topped it. After a week of listening into his highlights of english on the phone, he came unstuck. Some stupid fat overweight (she properly was) had decided to come out as lesbian a few years back. this was not mentioned on her application. My colleague being the smooth cunt controller he is properly sensed she was not warming to his charms. Don’t know what the fuck happened on the phone, but all i heard was, ‘so your gay’, ‘when did you come out of the closet?’ (i thought closet was only used by tabloids to describe those tory mp’s who were found to be kinky fucks? oranges in mouth and shit!) ‘how did the husband take it’, ‘you now happy being that?’ this shit carried on for over 3 minutes (i was counting) God knows how the trucker woman on the other end was taking all this shit. Being described as ‘that’ and having some tosser in the media delving into your private shit, all in the name of some shite daytime tv programme. The point? well, Cecil is a nice guy, but he always tries to hard. After today I’m sure he feels a prick (rightly so, he fucked up with the bigotry shit) and will hopefully reign in the enthusiasm for this soul-destroying job. Because if he don’t he will properly find himself getting promotion over me…stupid boy Cecil!

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